Staying in Love

"In a way, nobody sees a flower, really, it is so small we haven't time-and to see takes times, like to have a friend takes time." Georgia O'Keefe

I think I have mentioned in these pages before that our church community has been studying a small book together this Lent. The book, Three Simple Rules by Bishop Rueben Job, outlines three simple rules he sees in the scriptures and in the works of the founder of Methodism, John Wesley. The rules are: Do no harm. Do good. Stay in love with God. It has been interesting and enlightening to listen to the many different ways in which people approach and enter these seemingly simple concepts. There have been many conversations about the difference  between doing no harm and doing good. Other good conversation has centered around how our life experience colors our interpretation of the rules. This, of course, is true of all we do, of how we see everything, from the scriptures to our political leanings to our moral compass through the lens of our life experience. So while doing no harm and doing good may seem to put us into 'doing' mode with easily defined goals and objectives, the actual action can be fraught with a subtext that further defines our faith and questions our identity. 

Of these three rules, I have been most fascinated by the 'staying in love with God' part. What does it mean to stay in love with God? Over the last nearly 40 days, I have been thinking about what it means to stay in love with anyone, anything. Most people have had the experience of 'falling' in love, an emotion-filled roller coaster of highs and lows, of surging hormones and light headed proclamations. Falling in love is much like a conversion experience…..full of mountain tops and very few valleys. 

But staying in love is something very different. Staying in love requires commitment. Commitment to being present to another, of spending time together. Commitment to learning as much as humanly possible about the other. Commitment to accept the beauty and the mystery, even the things that annoy you, about someone. Commitment to understanding and working out misunderstandings. So many commitments. Staying in love means to be in the relationship for the long haul, even when it is rote, boring, stressful or even when you find another more exciting or beautiful. The commitment to staying in love requires the ability to be quiet and listen for whatever scrap of meaning you can take from another's midnight ramblings. Staying in love means clothing your heart with compassion and vulnerability even when you know you might have it broken. Staying in love means sacrifice, a word we often run from.

All of these attributes of staying in love also apply to what it means to stay in love with God. In order to be in a relationship, I have to be willing to show up, be present and pay attention to how the Holy is moving in my life. It also means that I have to settle for not understanding, not being able to explain the mystery of what we share. I have to keep my heart open knowing that it might get broken but resting assured that the mending message with help grow the relationship.

As a way of reminding our worshiping community to stay in love with God during the week we have sung a love song as we ended our worship together on Sunday mornings. We have lifted our voices singing "Night and Day", "Always", and "Every Breath You Take". These songs, meant to describe the love of two people for one another, quickly take on new meaning when we hear ourselves singing our love to the Sacred. Smiles spread across faces, eyes take on a knowing gleam, people lift their heads a little higher often leaning into their neighbor, swaying to the music. Like a chorus at the end of a rousing musical, we end our worship in a finale of declaring our love before one another, hoping and praying it will carry us through another week as we commit once again to a relationship that has carried us even when we have not known it. 

On Sunday, we will celebrate Palm Sunday and move into the days we call Holy Week. As I make my way into these evocative days, I pray that I can be present to the message of the scriptures that are familiar while hearing them in new ways. New ways that will find me renewing my vow to stay in love. 

Have a blessed weekend……………..

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.