A holiday tradition at our home is to watch the classic film “It’s a Wonderful Life”. I never tire of it and seem to see something new in it every Christmas season. This story, that to some may seem too saccharin sweet and even predictable is, for me, a great reminder of what it means to travel this earth as a human connected in ways that are visible and invisible to us. George Bailey, the tragic hero who is forever having his dreams dashed, is in so many ways, each of us. George makes plans, dreams big, and then is caught in the net of life that has him sacrificing, giving, and letting go over and over again. In his deep despair over his perceived failures, he tries to take his own life but is rescued by a wayward angel who is assigned to George. The angel’s job? To prove to George the many ways he has indeed had a ‘wonderful life’, one that has impacted countless people in ways that he never knew about.
The climax of the movie has George being surrounded by all those whose lives he has touched. Each person pours money on the table in front of him, recounting how he has been important in ordinary and extraordinary acts of kindness and generosity. The scene never fails to bring tears to my eyes, not only for George, but for all of us who walk through the world never knowing the true impact we make. A kind word here. A generous act there. A smile offered at just the right time. A word of affirmation not withheld but given in its fullness.
Last week our home had what I am coming to see as an ‘it’s a wonderful life experience.’ In true Advent fashion, it came to us as surprise. We received a phone call from a young man we hosted ten years ago as an exchange student from France. It was a short exchange of only two weeks but when language is a challenge and the order of your family life is interrupted, I admit it seemed much longer than that. This young man was doing a road trip across the US and wanted to come for a visit. Our first thought was that this was not a convenient time. My work is very busy at this time of year and both Seattle sons would be arriving for the holidays. It didn’t feel like we could upend our lives to host someone who we remembered as being a less than easy guest.
But something in us said ‘yes’ and we agreed to pick him up at the bus station. In the two days that preceded his arrival, we questioned whether or not we had taken leave of our senses but decided to hold it all gently. Somehow I think, at some deep level, we knew that this was a gift we were meant to receive. At the station, I recognized him right away and he greeted us with such openness as if no time had passed at all.
It was clear time had passed,however, because our guest’s English had improved quite a bit while our French had not moved one word in ten years! His reminiscences began almost immediately as we crossed over the Mississippi. ” Here’s where you showed me the….the…eagles!” These pronouncements continued as he moved from room to room in our house. “Here’s where there were many breakfast foods and the comics in the newspaper.” “Here is where we celebrated my birthday.” This happened over and over until we came to realize that, what we had seen as not one of our finer moments as hosts, had been for this young man a very significant time. After four days, as I delivered him to his bus and the next leg of his cross country tour, he left me with these words: ” You know, it was really because of you all that I wanted to come back and do this trip. It was such a good time.”
I tell this story not because I really believe we were such fine hosts. I tell it because it was a lesson for me that we never know, really know, the impact of our words, an act of kindness or the ways we truly affect another human being. George Bailey was just living his life, doing the best he could with those he met every day. We were just fulfilling one of those parental obligations that happened to come our way. But it was clear to this young man, it had been much more than that.
Perhaps as Christmases go, this will be the one when we remember the year our long, lost French student came to visit and reminded us to be aware, very aware, of our words, our actions, both ordinary and extraordinary. Because we just never know. We just never know. Perhaps this will be the year when we remember once again that it is truly, ‘ a wonderful life’!
