“I settle into your stillness
searching
seeking
trusting your joy.

You wrestle with me
question me
take me seriously
I bless the honesty of your love.”
~Ruth Burgess

The last several days have been odd ones. In addition to contracting the terrible hacking and phlegm producing illness that is traveling from person to person, I have found that the irregularity of a consistent schedule as we moved into the new year has got me discombobulated. I have this sense of moving from one action to another without ever accomplishing any of them. In addition to all the already present disorder, I got a new computer and am now being presented with all kinds of learning and problem solving that, under normal circumstances, would not be so bad. But given the short circuits that have made up my daily life, it all seems like a big mess!

Instead of trying to take control of all this, which is my normal way of doing things, I have made the choice to simply be present to the lack of order, to the chaos. It has not been easy. However, I feel I am in the process of learning some good lessons. While staying present in the moment, I am trusting that things will work themselves out in the end. It could be delusional but I don’t think so. In fact, I think this is the place where real creativity shows up. It is where the Spirit enters to remind us of the inner power with which we are all blessed.

Yesterday I was in a meeting in which we began to speak about ‘chaos theory.’ Now I don’t claim to be able to quote much factual information about this mathematical theory that is used to describe how order comes out of chaos in what often seems like random ways. But I was struck with the idea that as a people of faith, we have been birthed and nurtured in the stories of chaos theory. Our beginning story told in the Book of Genesis, sets the tone for how with a chosen and powerful Breath, night and day, darkness and light rolled out of what appeared to be chaos. Over and over again in the scriptures, the people who longed for the Holy walked into situations of wilderness, hoping beyond hope, that order would emerge from the seemingly random experiences of walking down unfamiliar roads. Rivers where crossed. Mountains were climbed. Lives were changed. These experiences of chaos were and are the foundations of the Hebrew and Christian households.

Like our ancestors, we can be reminded that the real learnings of the chaotic moments in our lives most often come when we can “settle into stillness” and allow ourselves to be “wrapped around in wonder and grace.” In these moments we come to know that we do not travel any of this journey alone. Through order and chaos we are taken seriously by a Love that will not let us go. For better or worse.

May we each walk with trust and hope this day through whatever comes our way, blessed by the creative Spirit within.