"Never have we pushed so many children on to the tumultuous sea of life without the life vests of nurturing families and communities, caring schools, challenged minds, job prospects, and hope."
~Marian Wright Edelman
I have several friends whose grandparents lived with them when they were children. Three generations in one household. I believe they are better for the experience. I believe those cultures where this practice is still the norm have something to teach us, we who ‘have it all’, we who maintain our ‘personal space’. I am reminded of their stories of a grandmother’s wisdom when a parent was too close to the conflict, too tired to really listen.The stories those grandparents told were woven daily into the fabric of the young people’s lives not simply caught at the once-a-year Thanksgiving dinner table.
It continues to be one of my beliefs that, as a culture, we have done ourselves a great disservice by segregating our generations in the ways we do. There is somehow a notion that each generation only wants to ‘hang out’ with their own kind. Of course, there are experiences I want to have with only people my age but the fullness of my life needs the wisdom of those older and those younger to hold up the mirror so I can more clearly understand who I am, what my life is about.
Our churches can be the place were this kind of segregation happens most intentionally and to the greatest loss. We segregate our children out to classes and away from worship because ‘they will not understand’. We relegate our teenagers to the basement and wonder why when they emerge as young adults,they do not feel welcome.We allow the wisdom of our elders to go unnoticed, untapped by all the other generations who so need their life knowledge. How did this happen?
As I have continued to read the Book of Exodus over these past months, it is clear to me that those nomads needed the ‘whole people of God" to make it through the wilderness. So do we. We need our tribe that contains the storytellers of the history and traditions that have held us. We need the rebellion and questions of our youth to propel us toward the future and to keep us honest. We need the awe and openness of the children to keep us living with joy and hope and a playful spirit.
How are you spending this day? Will you surround yourself with people ‘just like yourself’, from your own generation? Here is an invitation….even a challenge. Spend some time this day with someone older or younger and see what gifts might be waiting in that experience, in their presence.
"Everywhere, true elders will appear within the human community. Neighborhood by neighborhood, they will build bridges across the chasms of ignorance and intolerance that separate us. Thus they will take their rightful place among the young and once again define the terms of passage into adulthood. The children will be given a way to reach adulthood and the spirit of nature will be enriched by a fully human maturity. The ancient dreams of those who have gone before will be empowered in the councils with such visionary insight that the people will survive. So be it." Steve Foster, The School of Lost Borders